25 famous actors you didn’t know appeared on Friends

19. Jeff Goldblum

Leonard Hayes – “The One With The Mugging” – S9E15

Jeff Goldblum made a memorable appearance on Friends as Leonard Hayes, the director and lead in a play for which Joey is auditioning. Joey admires Hayes and desperately wants the part, but he blows his audition.

Before Hayes sends him on his way, Joey is given another chance after one of the producers takes a liking to Joey. He is also given some not-so-helpful advice from the legendary director.

“Don’t be afraid to explore the vertical,” Hayes tells him. “And don’t learn the words. Let the words learn you.”

Oh. Okay.

Joey comes back for his second audition. He’s late and Leonard Hayes doesn’t give him time to go to the bathroom. Considering how much Yoohoo Joey drank before the audition, this is a problem. But it ends up working in Joey’s favor as his urge to pee gives him the urgency Hayes was looking for in his audition, a “squirmy quality” as he calls it.

Joey gets a callback and decides to use the peeing thing to his advantage again, gathering up as many beverages as he can. He aces his audition, gets the part, and Hayes congratulates him by telling him “You can relax now”…and that’s exactly what Joey does. He relaxes all down the front of his pants.

Jeff Goldblum could have easily played himself in this episode. Surely Joey would have loved to get a part in a play, opposite the guy who starred in Jurassic Park and The Fly. Instead, he brought his peculiarly charming weirdness to the role of legendary director Leonard Hayes.